I've been doing really bad today, and I don't know why really. I feel really empty and lonely, and people trying to talk to me about it just makes me feel worse, but I want to talk about it, it's weird.
I fell asleep good in 7th today and had a dick drawn on my finger.
And it scares me that she doesn't care at all, that she probably didn't care nor want to get attached to me for a long time, that my best efforts were nothing to her. It's really shitty of a feeling, and I've never felt this was because I've never fallen for someone as hard as I fell for her, and I put everything including my feelings into us, just to have her say that she isn't trying to get attached.. It haunts me now, the whole "I'm trying not to get too attached to you" thing, it's really painful to think about, and I think it's in-part that I've never been in a relationship like the one with her, I was hopelessly in-love, and she was just playing with me.. To have all of this going through my head, I can't help but think of how shitty of a boyfriend I can be, if I can't make her happy. I don't know, I think I'm just lurking into thoughts now. It's all really scary. I'm sorry I wasted a little more than 2 months of your life, and I hope you can meet someone who'll make you much happier than I ever could have made you..
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