When I read back my blog, it sort of scares me, really. All it is is a wave of happiness and sadness, and it seems repetitive, but whatever I guess.
Seniors are gone. Forever. Never to see them around school. And it's really depressing to me. 70% of my friends consisted of Seniors, and a lot of them I just got close with this year, like Komal, Jesse, and Tahmeed, and it really is depressing me. There's always Facebook and Tumblr but it's not the same as seeing them almost everyday in school and hugging them knowing they're true friends who at least might truly care about me in terms of being significant to them. Bro-night sometime next weekend, and I'm going to drag people by the neck to come to it as one last night together. Two graduation parties last-weekend though, and those were awesome~
Aside from that, I'm lonely, and I miss that feeling of having someone to talk to literally all day that's interesting to some degree. And I miss cuddling, and holding hands, and cute little kisses, and all that bullshit, but it's not going to get to me again because of everything that happened. I can wait for college, no problem.
I really want to dedicate an unhealthy amount of time to longboarding this Summer, but shitty moods that are very frequent don't help at all.
There's no point in doing anything. I'm just a awkwardly fat, pathetic loser. I feel like I could sit in bed all Summer and no one would give a shit except my parents because no matter what I do, it's shite. I'll never be what I'd like to. I'll never accomplish what I'd like to. And the man who invented mirrors is overlord of self-hate.
Eh, here's to the Junior school year~
